In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Only Sixteen.”  In response to the prompt about what I was like at sixteen. From the time of about fifth grade I became a loner and very shy. Before that I had a number of friends and acquaintances and relatives I was close to. But beginning around 1986 when we moved to Garden City I became somewhat aloof and distant which matches my personality type to a degree being a INTJ or Rational NT according to Myers-Briggs Indicator and the awesome books Please Understand Me and Please Understand Me II. I have returned somewhat to my loquacious self in recent months. But at sixteen I was extremely shy and reticent. I became somewhat suicidal feeling sorry for myself at around this time. But then BM entered my life and I became an infatuated maniac because she was so kind to me. I said to heck with suicide I want something like her. I am still searching for something akin to that boundary of heaven which was her. I wrote 1000 poems to her at least tangentially about her. She was lovely- a little blonde whom everyone adored. I was unworthy of her. Around the same time, Ty Cullor passed on and I don’t think any of us have ever recovered from that that knew him he was such a good guy. I hope I don’t dishonor his name by associating myself with him. Anyway, though at the time I thought I never wanted those days to end, I am glad they did that year of 1991 because I was in a lot of angst and pain emotionally. Of course, I would live to see 1995 which was the year I was first affected by paranoid schizophrenia. Since I have started taking medicine things have been a lot better. However, I never do shake hearing audio hallucinations like rock songs in one ear and classical music in the other at the same time with the words and tunes slightly adjusted. They are more distracting than anything. Well, ta.

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