I am in a transitional or bardo state as it were which means the island between or something like that according to a book I once read. My weekends are kind of like that just as for everyone else. I often feel I am going from one reality to another because I feel like there is something different coming around the corner always despite also feeling a dichotomous ennui because of the lack of any difference. So sometimes I guess I feel one way sometimes another. Frankly, I think it changes from one epoch to another which is to extend my forty years to many years beyond that. I may be just babbling.
A friend responded negatively to me today and has triggered my schizophrenia big time. Fortunately I have had a lot of support from my girlfriend so I hope to talk to her so she can soothe my wounds which are being inflicted steadily right now from somewhere in my brain. I could use a little praying over me. I am also praying for me so. Of course that sometimes stirs me up when I pray making me feel worse off. But occasionally it calms my heightened fears. Of course it may give God room to act. I know we are to pray without ceasing but that is difficult sometimes for me anyway.
I had a good time with friends Friday though going to a movie called San Andreas. It starred the Rock and Carla Gugino. By not overacting the Rock outdid the wonderful Gugino who is a very good actress but I thought she kind of overdid it. She has beautiful eyes though as does her daughter in the movie Alexandra Daddario who does a much better job. But the star of the show are the digital effects tearing San Francisco to bits with tons of detail thrown in. In a subplot about geologists Paul Giamotta does a great job of acting as a weary scientist trying to warn the populace. There are a lot of loud concussive noises during this movie. Ta