I know I have a flawed view of God. How that works out in real time I have no idea. I suppose I view him incorrectly in a number of ways. I need to become more saturated in the word I guess. I don’t know how to change without the Holy Spirit. It is only possible to change significantly with the spirit of God. I kind of think I have allowed a few New Age concepts in because of what I read. If not new age, evolutionary thought. Don’t get me wrong I hate evolution. But I have focused on supposed geniuses who were very negative and influenced my limited intelligence. I always thought I could handle it the various philosophies and faraway notions of humanity. But these have let me down whereas God has never let me down. So I suppose I need to pray deeply and fervently and study the scriptures for it’s ‘illuminations’ and keep what the scriptures say.